I've told everyone to stay away from me,
maybe its time to practice what i preach,
i should stay away from you now.


i dont wanna feel this way,
i dont wanna have to hate life so much,
but everything around me, i swear.

i have to fight so hard,
i'm losing my fight,
17 years of battle, its hard to keep it up.
how much longer i'd have to take,
so much longer i cant wait.

i don't want to be the one to give it all up,
i don't want to be just a draft,
black & white and then its set
but do i deserve what i get.

its never been about me,
but i've learnt it has to be,
i need to be selfish,
i need to need,
& now i don't know why but i need you to need me.

i'm not good enough,
i'm not smart enough,
i'm not what you want,
i'm not what anyone wants
its time to accept it.

music: true - ryan cabrera

hey guys, i haven't posted in such a long time.
this year has just been really hectic,
everything from personal life to academics.
it really was one hell of a ride.

'o's is over and now there's really not much
we can do. i'm currently
HUNTING for a job, no success unfortunately.
too many misses and no hits.
oh wells, forge on!

i just recently came back from japan
and let me tell you i'm begging to go back just for the bloody
natural aircon which does not exist here.
i swear it feels like an oven over here.

i just finished watching xiaxue's bff challenge 1
damn freaking stupid -.-'
whatever luh i was bored.

yesterday we had a 2s2 class outing and while they went
to cycle their hearts out, val, huiying, jesline and i stayed
to play bridge and formed our own bridge club!
how fun(:
and huiying's mum bought these chicken wings
that were absolutely delicious ((((((:
and i ate a lot of it while playing hahhahaha.
-guilty look-
then this stupid linda right she said she'll tell me about the
japan trip then in the end she never luh!
and i went there just to hear her stupid stories
(don't get egoistic,linda)
oh and i tried to learn to bike since i obviously can't
with no hand-eye-leg coordination whatsoever and
i can proudly say that i am halfway there!
JOY TO THE WORLD (:

alrighties, christmas is approaching and urm
i seem to have forgotten that the hol actually existed until
i went to japan and disney and universal studios were
playing christmas songs like non-stop
gah, it just feels like....... blehzxz

oh i went to sentosa exactly one week ago,
the day i went to sentosa was the only day it completely didn't rain
fantastic right? i got sunburnt; across my back, shoulders, below my
neck, face, arms and legs.
FREAKING FANTASTIC
well at least i got a tan :/


yeahyeah, i'm bored and i gotta catch up on some sleep
so CYA
(the photo is in tribute to ytd's outing)

and i hope i post soon :/

LOVE,
bel.

david
cook
"you'll
always
be
my
baby"


LOVE,
BEL♡

HEY YA'LL
omg, that sounded like that's so raven.
hehe.
it's only the fifth day of school and i already have panda eyes.
this is so great.
at least i finished most of my homework.

STRESS.
i think it was friday? that i started freaking about 'O's
cause i saw all our seniors coming back
and i was like oh yeah, they're getting their results soon.
then "SHIT!that's going to be us soon"
and all the teachers are freaking us out.
they're so sweet huh.
haha.

well, guess what, either jon's freaking blind
or he's freaking superficial.
i went to watch beauty world on sunday
and i saw him enter, then i was like
"ISN'T THAT JON!?!?!?!?!?!"
but esplanade had no reception in the theatre
so i couldn't sms him.
then during intermission when he got up to go to the loo
i stared at him as he passed by and he didn't recognise me!
wtf luh.
so only after the thing in the car i smsed him and he was
like "WHERE??!!!!"
-.-' stupid. and guess what he said?
he was too distracted by the hot guy two rows in front of him.
it's hard having a guy friend that is bi, -shakes head-
so naturally my first reaction was "WHERE WHERE?"
haha, yeah.
then i was like "sometimes i hate that you're bi, you don't notice
the girls anymore"
then he said "well, my girl might get angry if i pay too much attention
to the girls."
"so she feels better that you're paying attention to guys?"
"well not really but at least she's not competing with them."
omg, that fcuker has some kind of theory man.
LMAO.
AHAHAHHAA, ML WAS PLAYING IN BEAUTY WORLD
and he had that kind of mexican band chacha costume with the
ruffles and all that.
it was HILARIOUS.

oh well, a lot more funny things happened but i can't remember
them now.
so i shall give you LYRICS. (:

Some live for the bill
Some kill for the bill
She wined for the bill
Grind for the bill
(and she used to be the sweetest girl)
Some steal for the bill, if they got to pay they bill
(and she used to be the sweetest girl)
Tonight Wyclef, Akon, Weezy and Nia

High school she was that girl that make me do the hula hoop around the gym
(Just to get a peek again, she's a 10)
High school she was
That girl that make me do the hula hoop around the gym
(Just to get a peek again, she's a 10)
Never thought she would come and work for the president
Mr. George Washington (where my money at?)
She thought he'd call (where my money at?)
She had a good day, bad day, sunny day, rainy day
All she wanna know is (where my money at?)
Closed legs don't get fed, go out there and make my bread
All you wanna know is (where my money at?)
She ended up in a road car, bruised up, scarred hard
All you wanna know is (where my money at?)
She thought he'd call (where my money at?)

Cos I'mma tell you like Wu told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Cos I'mma tell you like Wu told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)

Pimpin' got harder cos, hoes got smarter
On the strip is something they don't wanna be a part of
Rather be up in the club shakin' for a thug
For triple times the money and spending it like they wanna
They got they mind on they money, money on they mind
They got they finger on the trigger, hand on the nines
See everyday they feel the struggle, but staying on they grind
And ain’t nobody takin’ from us, and that’s the bottom line
But I know there's a drop in the block
You move slow
You getting' pressure from cops
you don't know not to lay low
Because 25 to life is no joke
To all my real gorillas thuggin'
On top of corners every day strugglin'
All the beautiful women getting' money
Washin' them dollar bills like laundry

Cos I'mma tell you like Wu told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Cos I'mma tell you like Wu told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin' dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)

Money, money-money-money
Money, money-money-money
It drives the world crazy

(Weezy) She used to be (she used to be the sweetest girl)
She used to be the sweetest girl ever
Now she like sour ameretta
She wears a dress to the T like the letter
And if you make it rain she will be under the weather
She used to run track back in high school
Now she tricks off the track right by school
She takes a loss cos she don't wanna see her child lose
So respect her, I'll pay up for the time used
And then she runs to the pastor
And he tells her there will be a new chapter
But she feels no different after
And then she asks him…

i like the lyrics of this song even though i don't like Akon.
that's all.
BYEBYE!

music: lovestoned

HEY GUYS.

alrighty my weekend has been tres eventful.

firstly, on friday i had my violin lesson

god, i sound like a chicken dying.

that was horrible,

then went to meet kim and the rest for the concert thing

well, i think the sound system was f-ed up.

couldn't hear the singing at all.

oh funny fact 1: all the guitarist were hella good.

yeah then we went in for awhile and came out

went to cheers to get drinks,

damn cap wouldn't come off without a bottle opener.

oh wells, we got it off ANYWAY.

mhhhmmm, fin drinking then went back in,

and then went to pasta mania to eat

then went back just in time to here the end of cigsex performing

gosh, they were awesome

no really they were.

and then waited for armchair critic's performance.

they were good.

okay that marks the end of my night.

saturday,

gosh i woke up dead as a living person can be.

it was such a sleepy day

the only thing i managed to do was attend tuition

and get a headstart on my physics homework.

heh, some interesting conv went on during dinner

and that is about it.

sunday;

woke up at 7.30

(people go: OMG, 7.30 A.M ON SUNDAY MORNING?!!!)

yeah you read that right,

i was going to watch golden compass with my dad and bro

see, family bonding (:

yeah luh, golden compass was good.

then went to eat JAP FOOD,

YUMMILICIOUS. i had my soba and salmon(:

mmmmm.

then after that went to bugis

the good thing is i got my MCR t-shirts

the bad thing is i still hate bugis; over-populated

yeap then went home and slacccccckkkkeeedddddddddddd

WHAT IS THAT?

THAT FREAKING THING!

RUFUS THE NAKED MOLE RAT~~~~~~~~~

hehe, yeah that song is addictive.

ONE DAY TO MCR CONCERT,

OMG, -SCREAMS-

no im not actually screaming,

its 8.30 in the morning luh

you think i'm not scared of my neighbours?

people who get woken up from their sleep involutarily are

scarier than transvestite murderers.

well at least i am.

(people: why does it seem like she has a never ending supply of such photos?!)

well because the internet if full of them

damn, the last guy was gorgeous.

its unfair that i just post guys right?

kay i shall post the girl ones tmr.

ohman, i must post something funneh here

damnit, i msn didnt record it down for me

but jon said something about him and lex

seeing 50 year old women squealing like fangirls.

they call it "fangirl at 50"

as they apparently said that about me.

i'll have you know that i'm not ordinary fangirl!-shakes fist

i actually know the people i idolise (:

eh.........im running out of things to say..............

why am i still here?

me bored.

i think me going to jump off a bridge

hmmmmm, but water in sg river stinkayye

maybe i'll just do it when i get to sentosa tday.

righto, i suggest everyone watch

get karl! oh soo jung.

its sooooo niiiiiiccccceeeeeee.

yeappers, TATA!

slaps and spits,

bel.

yeah, hello david person.

David: Am i suppose to flame here? gosh, it's not even an ideal place to go. from an audience point of view, CGSSB had put up a great performance, and people like what's her name, michelle? should die.

eh firstly, may i ask how you're related to cgssb?

second of all, are you a prosecutor or a court judge by chance?
cause what right do you have to decide she gets a death sentence

and third of all,
by "not even an ideal place to go" you mean the location for the concert right?

oh kay let me start by saying,
anything i have said or am going to say is strictly my point of view
and does not mean to offend anyone or discriminate against anyone.
lastly i do not take sides and my opinion is not a generalisation of
any group whatsoever.

OH, and just to let you know, i'm from band.
yes a member of CGSSB as you so kindly put.
yes i totally agree that CGSSB had put on a great performance
although i myself beg to differ for my personal performance
incase you remember i'm that girl who read the poem for wind and tree
yes THAT girl. -.-'
anyway, not everyone appreciates music.
when you do something or make something there would be people
who like it and people who don't.
we can't make everyone think the way we do, if that is the case
what is this individuality that i hear people go on about and
themselves being "unique"

to put it bluntly when you say people like michelle should die
under what cause shall she die?
shall i say you should die because you said she should die?
because isn't that what happened between the different religions
the so-called root of the problem to "terrorism"
because it does not go with my "beliefs"
wait you might have been confused by that,
what i meant to say is that you might be entitled to say things like
she should die but it doesn't mean it is right or that others should
accept it or that it should happen.
have you ever wondered how your words might hurt others?
i admit i was hurt when i read michelle's words of the band
but i decided i need to remain calm, she is entitled to her views
and basically her bottom line was that cgssb and band music
is not her cup of tea, is that wrong? to claim you dislike something?
it is in a person's character to dislike something incase you do not
know this.
you might try to argue your case and say that since michelle had hurt
so many people all these flames are just payback.
im not saying i support michelle or approve of what she's said
but she knows that when she puts her words out like this
there is a risk, the risk of getting disliked,
of being flamed, of getting hurt. but she contemplated
and still decided to go through with it.
why? my thought is that she just wants to say something
about her personality, the fact that she prefers eldds rather
than band, because i don't know, her interest is in DRAMA?
its like saying that she prefers coffee to tea.

so if she wants to put out the fact that she is in fact quite
insensitive and a little biased and egoistic as well as arrogant
then shouldn't we let her?
what good is flaming her, it's already out in the open.

and actually i don't even know what this is about anymore,
but the whole reason i got involved was because
1. i cannot stand people ganging up on others
2. flamers should use their real names, the people getting flamed deserve that much
3. how many of you actually know michelle? how many of you can say that
you've actually spoken to her more than 2 times? how many of you
know her quirks, knows that she's tough on the outside and doesn't give
compliments to many people, know that she's stubborn, that she's incredibly smart,
that she doesn't go down without a fight, says things without thinking sometimes,
a real stickler for freedom of speech and an extremely cynical person.
random people who don't even know her are flaming her?
so what is this? you're not even her friend? what right do you have to SCOLD her.
do you even CARE about her, or are you just standing up for your own rights?

well, let me tell you something,
I CARE,
i care about the flamers,
i care about michelle,
i care about band,
i care about LD,
i care about whether anyone is going to get hurt,
i care about when everyone is going to grow up
i care about the end of this thing
i care about how it even got started
i care about everyone who is angry
i care about everyone who is upset
i care about your opinions
i care about your rights

if not, why would an outsider otherwise take part in such a
frustrating and time consuming situation?

,bel.

hello,

first of all.

isn't he delice?

alrighty. moving on,

musical evening was nervewrecking, my god

my hand was shaking when i was reading that damn poem that

not even i understood.

i did a horrible job by the way.

and my playing sucked that night ):

oh wells. no crying over spilt milk

alumni was da best

okay friday i went on to tessa's house.

oh oh i dyed my hair, the tips, goldish blonde.

yeah okay alright.

IT WASSSS FUUNNNNNNNNN(:

love tessa.

okay anyway.

saturday i had tuition, can feel my brain oozing out.

and then went to meet mei and aisyah to get

our mcr tickets stamped!

WHOOO WE DID IT. cutting queue here we come!

the black parade was really lame though. :/

haha.

alrighty today

i woke up to finding out that many people have

been flaming michelle for the fact she wrote mean things about the band

please, everyone who knows michelle knows she'll write things like that.

i can understand why y'all are so angry but the thing is can't you even

use your freaking names to flame her?

i wouldn't have even bothered with this whole issue if it weren't

for the fact that you guys won't even use your real names

im not saying that either of you are wrong,

i'm just saying that if you want the right to express your opinion

don't hide behind a name, otherwise you have absolutely no right to flame her.

capicshe?

ah, that's my absolutely boring week for you,

wanna talk to me? i'd gladly reply

wanna flame me?

bring it on.

bel.

YELLO.

okay let's start from sat,

dressed as a scenester,

then sent my maid off at the airport.

yeah cause im not going on a holiday this year i'm really upset

then at the airport i kept pushing my dad around, literally and went like

"wah lau, what is this , cheap thrill?! bring me to the airport and not going anywhere."

yeah and my dad was laughing at me cause i got so worked up about it.

whatever, dad

sunday was a slloooowwww borrrriiinnng ddddaaayyyy.

i missed classes and band on mon again.

today i went out for lunch with kim.

it was fun, bought loads of stuff at watson. HAHA.

yeah and "under her influence" i got a second piercing on both sides.

uh huh, that's all, BUH BYE.

NEWSPAPERr

isabel lam
crez.cgssb.tpt.
back and no longer hidden.
yeah that's me.
sarcastic
stupid
finds everything humourous

CORRODED r

draco & hermione
cgssb
anti-dan
morbid inc.
behind our backs.
dongbangshinki:
jaejoong
yunho

TORCHES r

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CHEEK OF NIGHTr

All you wanted was
someone who really cares
And I didn't even notice
you were there
I promise that I'll never
ever make that same mistake
Not twice
I was a fool for way to long
What you wanted,
I could not see
That was then...this is now
Took some time to figure out
Love is all you need

HIS BOUNTY r

i can't find my old list of links :/

BRINKr

PAST LAYOUTSr

errr. if you have then you put them here. this are for past layouts that YOU make. remove this section if you dont make skins.

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